The Widow's Almanac: In the bleak midwinter...

I find the darkness of winter hard to deal with, especially as it's the lead up to the milestones of Tim's birthday, Christmas, New Year and then the anniversary of his death.

Here are a few things that I have found helpful:

• If you go out, have lamps and radios on timers so there is light and sound when you get in. You can use plug timers, smart light bulbs and sockets, and smart phone apps.
• Smart heating systems mean that you can make sure the heating is on when you get in. 
• Keep moving – exercise warms you up and can pick up your mood.
• Hot water bottles are old school but comforting.
• Have a lovely snug blanket on the sofa, and buy yourself a cosy dressing gown and pair of pyjamas or onesie. 
• Draughtproof everything you can.
• Candles or bio-ethanol burners make rooms feel cosier.
• Fairy lights aren't just for Christmas - LED ones indoors and solar ones outdoors give an extra glow.
• A fleecy electric over-blanket means you can be snug, even when the rest of the house isn't.
• Being ill on your own is rubbish - create an 'I'm not well pack', with cold and flu remedies and nice things too.

Someone once said to me to think of this time of year being when the seeds are in the ground waiting for spring. This helps me feel a bit more positive about the dark mornings.
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Seasonal affective disorder
​Many people get affected by changes in the seasons, but if the winter blues are lasting a long time and really affecting your life, you might have winter seasonal affective disorder (SAD). This is a low mood that gets worse in the winter. According to the NHS, symptoms of SAD (sometimes called winter depression) include:

• a persistent low mood
• a loss of pleasure or interest in normal everyday activities
• irritability
• feelings of despair, guilt and worthlessness
• feeling lethargic (lacking in energy) and sleepy during the day
• sleeping for longer than normal and finding it hard to get up in the morning
• craving carbohydrates and gaining weight.

Our sleep patterns, appetite, mood and activity are linked to levels of light, and for some people the levels of light in the winter just aren't enough. Lower levels of light can also affect our sleep-wake cycles. There a few things that might help:

• Spend as much time in natural daylight as you can.
• Take regular exercise, outdoors and in daylight if possible.
• Plan ahead – stock up on things, such as ready meals, if you know you won't have the energy to cook.
• Self care is really important - create a self-care box, with favourite books or films, things to pamper yourself with, a cosy wrap or blanket.
• Rest when you need to.
• Try light therapy – change some of your lightbulbs for brighter ones (the higher the lux the brighter the light), get a light box or SAD lamp, or try a sunrise alarm clock.

Vitamin D may or may not help SAD, but the NHS recommends that people in the UK should consider taking a daily vitamin D supplement during the autumn and winter.
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If SAD is really affecting your life, talk to your GP. For some people, cognitive behavioural therapy, counselling, psychotherapy or antidepressants can help.

​Updated 20 November 2025

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