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Dating words and terms

15/6/2022

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If it's been a while since you've dated, the language change can be daunting. Here's a few definitions that might help you work out what people are taking about - the blog on abbreviations might help too. 
 
Allosexual
someone who is sexually attracted to others (the opposite of asexual)

Aromantic
someone who does not experience the feelings of romantic love

Asexual
someone who is not sexually attracted to people

Bae
significant other

Benching
saving someone for later

Bisexual
attracted to both men and women

Bot
fake account

Breadcrumbing
being offered ‘crumbs’ of a relationship to keep you on the hook

Catch and release
a one night stand

Catfishing
leading someone into thinking they are in a relationship and then scamming them

Cisgender
someone who identifies with their gender assigned at birth

Cuffing
hooking up with someone just for the colder months and festive season

Curve
a rejection that’s subtler than a flat out ‘no’

Cushioning
keeping backups or standbys in case your current relationship doesn’t work

Daterview
a date that feels more like an interview

Deep like
researching someone by going through their social media profiles

Define the relationship (DTR)
deciding whether the relationship is casual or going somewhere

Demisexual
someone who is attracted to personalities once they get to know them rather than an immediate physical attraction

E-Fit
curated social media profiles that act as a dating profile

Emergency call
that set-up call that will get you out of a bad date

Firedooring
someone who doesn’t respond to texts, but randomly makes contact

Fuccboi
a man who only wants sex and runs away from relationships

Fuckbuddy/friend with benefits
a friend for sex without a long term relationship

Gaslighting
having feelings dismissed and belittled

Gay
same-sex attracted

Genderfluid
people outside the gender binary, or whose gender identity varies

Ghosting
cutting off discussions with no explanation or warning

Half-night stand
someone who leaves straight after sex

Hatfishing
bald men wearing hats to hide their lack of hair

Hey and pray
saying hello and hoping for a response

Homosexual
same sex attracted

Incel
involuntary celibate

Jelly
jealous

Kittenfishing
people who lie on their profile to look better than they are

Kray bae
when your significant other goes off the rails

Layby
dating someone while looking for better options in the fast lane

Love bombing
being (excessively) showered with love – it can be a prelude to manipulation and abuse

Meetcute
the sweet backstory of how a couple met

Micro-cheating
Not really cheating, but approaching the border of cheating

Monleying
moving from one relationship straight to the next

Monogamous
someone who sees only one person

Negging
backhanded compliments

Non-date date
a meet up that’s no specified as a date

Non-binary
someone who does not see themselves as male or female

On a thing
dating

One-night stand
someone who leaves the next morning

Open relationship
a committed relationship that allows partners to see other people

Orbiting
when the person who has ghosted you hangs around on your social media

Pansexual
attracted to all genders

Peacocking
dressing up to attract attention

Pie hunting
someone who seeks out and dates vulnerable people

Pocketing or stashing
dating but not being introduced to their friends or family

Polyamorous
someone who has relationships with a number of people

Queer
a reclaimed word for people across the LGBTQ+ spectrum

R-bombed
when someone reads your message but doesn’t reply

Roaching
cheating and then claiming that the relationship wasn’t exclusive

Sapiosexual
someone who is attrcayed to intelligence

Several night stand
A relationship that’s a few nights and nothing more

Sex interview
sex before a real date

Simping
someone who is doing everything they can to get someone’s attention

Situationship/casual relationship
a relationship that’s not serious

Sliding into DMs
flirting through messaging

Slow fade
ghosting, but slowly

Slow texting
slow responses – busy, or not that into you?

Snack/on fleek
pretty damn gorgeous

Submarining, haunting or zombieing
when the person who has ghosted you suddenly reappears as if nothing has happened

Summer fling/freckling
hooking up with someone just for the summer

Swipe right
liking someone on an app

Texlationship
messaging but never quite meeting up

Thirst trap
a social media post about anything that’s actually designed to say ‘look how gorgeous I am’

Thicc
curvy

Tindstagramming
contacting someone on Instagram direct messaging when they don’t match you on Timder

Transgender
someone who identifies as a different gender to that assigned at birth

Uncuffing
shedding the winter relationship for the summer one

V card
virgin

Werk
when it’s been hard working getting a date

Wokefishing
Someone saying how marvellous and woke and liberal they are, but it’s really just an act


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    I was widowed at 50 when Tim, who I expected would be my happy-ever-after following a marriage break-up, died suddenly from heart failure linked to his type 2 diabetes. Though we'd known each other since our early 20s, we'd been married less than ten years. ​

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